Thursday, May 31, 2012

Jonathan Lucroy: his story smells like 3 day old fish

Jonathan Lucroy, Catcher Milwaukee Brewers

By now you've heard the story.  Catcher hurts hand when wife accidentally knocks a suitcase on it. 

Brewers catcher Jonathan Lucroy was reaching under the bed in his hotel room Sunday night in search of a lost sock when his wife moved a suitcase (according to a team spokesman, it is not uncommon for wives to occasionally travel with the team). The piece of luggage fell on his right hand, resulting in what the Brewers called a “boxer’s fracture.”

An injury that most commonly affects boxers you got it from a suitcase.  Really?

That's 3 day old fish and I ain't buy it.  

This sounds like the kind of lie you make up when you first start driving and you hit a curb and flatten 2 tires trying to peel out to impress a girl and your dad ask you what happened?

"I was turning and then I sneezed and that made my arm twitch and then a dog ran out in front of me, and I swerved to miss him and I hit the curb and bent both rims."

Don't shit a shitter.   No suitcase fell on his hand when he was reaching for socks.  What kind of Rube Goldberg excuse is that?

Here's what probably happen.

His wife tags along on the road, so you know he's not happy to begin with.  He's 25, this is only his second full year in the Majors so he would rather hang out and go drinking with his teammates, but no, she has to come along for the West Coast trip.  Great.

It's Sunday night after the game in Phoenix, they have to fly out immediately because they have a day game the next afternoon in Los Angeles.

He's packed and ready to go and she's in the bathroom taking her sweet ass time packing her toiletries because since she's in another city, she thinks she's on vacation.  She even brought along her impractical, but stylish, antique suitcase.  Guess who gets to carry it?

She doesn't understand that he's working.  This is his job.  He has obligations.  He's going to miss the team bus to the airport.  He tries to asks her nicely to hurry up, but he's so pissed, it comes out mean.  This just makes her go slower.

"I don't want to forget anything.  Do I have my phone charger?"

He's just sitting there on the bed fuming.  After about 4 minutes he gets up and looks in the bathroom and she's on her phone checking messages.

That's it.  He just snaps and punches the wall - BAM.  He immediately realizes he's broken his hand.    His hand is fractured in 3 places and he might have thrown away the entire season, maybe his career, but he can't think about that right now, because his wife starts sobbing uncontrollably so he has to comfort her.

The hotel phone rings.  This makes her cry louder.  He grabs a pair of socks and sticks them in her mouth and runs to grab the phone.

"The bus was suppose to leave 10 minutes ago.  Where are you?"
"I hurt my hand."
If he's proven negligent in breaking his hand, he could lose his pay check.
He looks around the room and sees the antique suitcase, his wife with a pair of socks in her mouth and begins to make up a corny lie.
He hangs up the phone.
"So now everyone is going to blame me.  Thanks a lot.  You're the idiot who punched the wall.  I had nothing to do with it."

She starts crying again.  
He starts thinking if he's able to come back from his injury, he has to get divorced before he signs a big free agent contract. 

No comments:

Post a Comment